Puddles

It was like jumping into a puddle mistaking it for an ocean. While you thought it was deep but the ground touches your feet just as soon as you jump. The murk stains your shoes and the wetness seeps into your socks to your feet. That's when you know it was a mistake and you start thinking about cleaning it up. It hurts when you were hoping for good and it never occurs to you. You stand in the puddle and keep staring at the murk on your boots. You retrospect and calculate how you got into this.

For some this ocean is the ocean of promises that turns out to be a murky puddle of lies. That's exactly where you fall and stain yourself or even worse, break a leg. Breaking a leg and never trusting anymore to dive into oceans. I don't know if heartbreaks are only for those in love, because it hurts twice as much to know you were a fool. And you know what's the worst part than breaking a leg? You getting used to falling into puddles. The first time you exclaim with a 'What the hell', 'Oh shit!' or 'Oh my God'. The next time you might say, 'Oh! Not again!'. But when you are habituated, you smirk and move on thinking, 'I knew this was coming.' This is when you carry on with a bittersweet relation with puddles. And one day, when falling in puddles aren't new anymore you dig a hole for someone. An ocean or puddle, the choice is yours.

Hues to the Rescue

Depression, anxiety, panic attacks and other mental health issues have stricken the youth today. There is no embarrassment to admit that I myself has been diagnosed with clinical depression. But I am not here to talk about myself. The purpose of this is solely to help anyone who is going through depression and anxiety. I am not a professional nor have I consulted any professional before trying this remedy. But I guess colours and shades can never do you any reverse harm.

Long time back, I read somewhere about drawing lines and calming one's mind. It had recommended different patterns for different mental breakdowns. Every pattern had a different remedy and this intrigued me. For the last couple of months or to be more specific, this year I have been occasionally going through phases of anxiety, stress and mental break down. These were there before on a more subtle level and were easier to tackle. I used to speak it out or the best that worked for me was writing it in a poetry. What happened later was that I was unable to write anything at all and I was delved into a major writer's block. I tried reading books, watching films and web series but nothing seemed to work.

Now let me tell you, I have always admired people who can draw. I am awed by the perfection of their skills and felt it was the direct form of expression through art! No manipulation, no facades yet open to interpretation. During my bouts of anxiety I felt a deep urge to express it and one day when I came across a box of old pastels, I was determined to try my hand at drawing. I was never trained so I took to YouTube. I started with the most simple drawings to learn the basics.

My motive was never really to be perfect but I just wanted to learn it. My first one was absolutely a novice product but I was satisfied. One after the other I kept on colouring, blending and drawing. Every time I realized my mind was messed up I left everything and quietly sat down with my art supplies.

Here's how I feel now after I started this:

My mind is focused on the drawing completely without any distraction bothering my mind.

After I finishing the blending, I started improvising my own ideas into it.

When I am done with the drawing I feel an immense joy. I look at it and say to myself, "That's my creation!"

I love creating different coloured skies, trees, birds and human, mostly silhouetted figures.

I love how the pastel shades side by side while blending creates a new shade. Like blue and yellow makes a lovely shade of green. Just like the people around me share their good vibes to create a positive atmosphere. Sometimes, I relate to the lighter shades being overlapped and smudged by the darker colours. So much like me and the monsters inside my mind. Everything goes well until the darker shades smudge while blending. As if the darker shades defeat the lighter shades. They don't create any colour. They just leave behind the dirty stain.

I have discovered the most effective way of handling my sudden break down and anxiety issues. I feel the lovely hues have rescued me!!










Let me know in the comments below if you want link to some awesome YouTube tutorials for pastel shading.